"Have you found Jesus?" "What, have you people lost him, again?"

[ambitious_wench]

One day Techi and I were driving down the highway, and every quarter mile or so someone had either nailed small signs to trees, or spray-painted on any vertical surface "Praise Jesus". The largest was on the massive granite wall left when they made the cut for the off ramp, letters at least 3 feet high in brilliant red. I looked over at Techi. "Every time I see those 'Praise Jesus' signs, I just wanna go 'Good Boy, Jesus, GOOD boy!' " She stopped laughing shortly after we got home.

I didn't write the following. And while I normally dislike the mass emails of this sort, I found this one funny. I hope you do too.

So, I'm standing at a bus stop and they pull up. A car load of well meaning, bible thumping nut cases that are just frantic! The middle aged professionally dressed woman rushes forward...She takes my arm and with trembling voice she asks...."Have you found Jesus?" Her eyes plead with an urgency that is out of proportion to a bus stop.

Now normally I just politely decline the sermon, and free religious paperwork that such folk pawn off on unsuspecting by-standers. But, unfortunately for her, she is the forth car to accost me in the last 9 minutes. So by now I'm beginning to wonder what the heck is wrong with these people. I mean if its not Christians it is the Jehovah's Witnesses. Can a simple Druid get no peace?

So calmly as I can muster, without being sarcastic I reply, "You people lost him, again??"

The woman looks confused. This is not the response she was hoping for and she needs to regroup. She takes a deep breath intending to launch into her sales pitch for her God and church, paying no heed to the concept that I might not be into being converted. I decide to not let her get going so I launch into a speech of my own...

"What is wrong with you Christians? Every time I turn around you've lost Him!" I hit her with a glare of accusation. "I mean really..." I take a measured breath. "How do you expect to have anyone follow a deity that you can't even find!"

The poor woman looks stunned. This isn't going so good. Panicked she looks desperately to the car... Surely one of the men can help.... Undaunted I press on... "Maybe the problem is with you people... I mean Muslims never seem to loose there deity. Come to think of it neither do Jews, or Pagans of any kind"

I look at the man getting out of the car. He's all smiles. "I realize you people used to burn people like me at the stake... What was that about... deity even? I may be a Pagan-heathen, but I have never ever woke up panicked that I couldn't find my Goddess or God. They are always right where they should be... In the fire of my candle, in the air that I breath, in the earth that I stand on, in the water of my spring. I never feel abandoned by my deity(ies)."

"Of course, you Christians aren't much fun..." I continue. By now they are all out of the car. Befuddled, aghast, and at a loss for words. "Of course," I offer trying to give them some defense for losing Jesus. "He could have left due to religious differences. If I remember correctly He was Jewish. So if you are really so eager to find him..." I smile gently to soften the blow. "Check the nearest synagogue. He's probably in there. Also you folks should try and remember that this is America... Where freedom of religion means ALL
religions."

Slowly they climb back into their car and drive away. I stand at the bus stop... No pamphlets, no bible, no dogma. I haven't found Jesus, but I haven't lost him either:)

Comments

[scascot.livejournal.com]

I found Jesus! He was hiding behind the couch the whole time!

I found Jesus! He was in my trunk when I got back from Tijuana!

I found Jesus! Now, he's "it"!

I found Jesus! He told me to get lost, and to quit bothering him!

I found Jesus! He was stuck on an MTA train!

Jesus saves! Rebound to Gretzky, he shoots...he scores!

I found Jesus! That'll be $32.50 for the finder's fee.

[turnberryknkn.livejournal.com]

How do you expect to have anyone follow a deity that you can't even find!

It might not have been the intention of the original e-mail author, but she/he nailed squarely on the head *the* single biggest challenge that we Christians face. I wrote a bit about it once here (http://www.livejournal.com/users/turnberryknkn/87166.html).

[ambitious-wench.livejournal.com]

Actually, Jeff, I found this entry of yours (http://www.livejournal.com/users/turnberryknkn/66469.html) to be more to my understanding of what I think Christianity should be about.

One day a young boy sat upon daddy’s knee;
“If you could be God, daddy, where would you be?
In a cloud, in a church, in a boat on the sea,
or maybe a sycamore tree, oh, do you think you would live in a tree?”

“Well clouds would be fine, but they never leave Heaven,
and churches are empty 6 days out of 7;
There’s not much to do in a boat on the sea
and I don’t think I’d live in a tree, my son, no I don’t think I’d live in a tree.”

“Then where does God live, daddy, where does he go?
I do want to find him, I do want to know;
I’ve looked for him here and I’ve looked for Him there,
and I’ve looked just about everywhere, now, oh I’ve looked about everywhere,”

“Then listen, my son, and the truth I will tell;
come out with your daddy, come out to the well.
Look deep in the water, now what do you see?”
“Daddy, I only see me,” he cried, “why daddy I only see me!”

“My son you may travel the see or the sod
and you’ll find many things but you’ll never find God;
for if you will search with a heart that is true,
you will find he is living in you, my son, you will find he is living in you”


In India there is a common greeting: Namaste.
"The divine in me recognises and greets the divine in you."

Namaste.
Edie